"For it is not enough to be a man; one must be a good man...and a good citizen...and a good friend."

Sir Thomas More was the Lord Chancellor of England under King Henry VIII. He was the highest judge in the land, a brilliant lawyer, and a close friend of the King. He had everything a man could want: power, wealth, and respect.

But Henry VIII wanted a divorce from his wife, Catherine of Aragon, so he could marry Anne Boleyn. The Pope refused. So, Henry decided to break away from the Catholic Church and declare himself the head of the Church of England. He demanded that all his officials sign an Oath of Supremacy, acknowledging the King’s new title.

Thomas More was a devout Catholic. He believed the King was wrong. He didn't scream or rebel, he simply refused to sign. He resigned his office and retreated to his home, hoping to live quietly.

But the King needed More's approval because More was known as the most honest man in England. If More refused to sign, it made the King look bad. So, Henry had him arrested and thrown in the Tower of London.

More was pressured by everyone. His wife begged him to sign. His friends begged him to sign. "Just say the words, Thomas! You don't have to mean them in your heart. Just sign the paper and come home." More refused. He said, "When a man takes an oath...he holds his own self in his own hands. Like water. And if he opens his fingers then, he needn't hope to find himself again."

More understood that you cannot be a "good citizen" or a "good friend" if you are not first a "good man". If he signed a lie, he would be betraying his own conscience. A man with no conscience is of no use to his King, his friends, or his country.

More was beheaded on July 6, 1535. His consistency of character cost him his head, but it saved his self. He died, as he famously said, "The King's good servant, but God's first."

Epictetus argues that we often try to fracture our lives. We try to be a "shrewd businessman" (who cheats a little) and a "loving father" (who teaches values). It doesn't work. The rot in one part of the apple spreads to the whole. To be a good citizen, you must possess the fundamental virtues of a good human: honesty, courage, and justice.

Errors & Corrections

• Don't think you can leave your ethics at the door. "It's just business" is the excuse of a bad man. If you lie at work, you are a liar at home. Character travels with you.
• Don't confuse "loyalty" with "complicity". A "good friend" does not help you bury a body. A good friend tells you when you are wrong. More was a better friend to Henry by refusing to validate his error than the sycophants who cheered him on.
• Don't compromise the "good man" to save the "citizen". If a law requires you to be unjust, you cannot be a good citizen by obeying it. You serve the state best by resisting its corruption.

Applications to Modern Life

Work

You are asked to fudge the numbers on a report to make the team look good. You think, "I'm being a good employee." No. You are being a bad person (dishonest). A bad person cannot be a good employee in the long run. The fraud will eventually destroy the team.

Politics

Voters often overlook the character flaws of their favorite candidates because, "they vote the right way." Epictetus warns us against this. A leader who lacks basic human decency (is not a "good person") cannot, by definition, be a "good citizen" or leader. The foundation is missing.

Interpersonal Relationships

You have a friend who cheats on their spouse but is "cool" with you. You tell yourself, "That's their business." But a person who betrays their closest vow has a crack in their character. Eventually, that crack will extend to your friendship. Character is consistent.

Leadership

A CEO who abuses waiters or yells at flight attendants is not a "good leader", no matter how high the stock price is. If they fail at being a decent human, they are failing the most basic test of authority. Hiring for character is more important than hiring for skill.

Social Media

We curate different personas. On LinkedIn, we are professional. On Twitter, we are aggressive. On Instagram, we are happy. This fracturing exhausts the soul. Try to be the same "good person" on every platform. Integration brings peace.

Athleticism & Sport

The athlete who uses performance-enhancing drugs to win is trying to be a "good athlete" while being a "bad person" (cheater). It is an unstable equation. The victory is hollow because the foundation is a lie.

Maxims

• The good person precedes the good citizen.
• Character is not a coat you take off.
• Hold yourself like water in your hands.
• One life, one standard.

In-depth Concepts

Homologoumenos (Consistency/Agreement)

The Stoic goal is a life that "agrees" with itself. Homologia means, "saying the same thing." Your actions, your words, and your thoughts should all say the same thing. If you are honest at church but dishonest at work, your life is in Diaphonia (discord).

Prosopon (Character/Role)

Epictetus often asks, "What character do you engage to maintain?" To be a "good person" is the primary Prosopon. All other roles (father, mayor, general) are secondary costumes worn over that primary skin. You can take off the costume, but you cannot take off the skin.